Astrological Holidays
Easter
Aries sneaks out to peek where the grown-ups are hiding the biggest, brightest eggs.
Taurus will only eat the finest of Swiss chocolate rabbits, ears first.
Gemini goes out to hunting until basket is full, then gets different basket and hunts again, then goes to all other known hunts in area with quick stops for outfit changes in between.
Cancer stays at home and hunts through goodies in the pantry that didn't make it into the baskets, specifically looking for red jelly beans.
Leos plan their hunting outfit - best pockets - for months, then won't go out because someone else had the same idea.
Virgo wears a neatly-pressed knickerbocker suit and tells everyone they're a bookkeeper-to-be, then organizes their eggs by size, color and contents.
Libra is still standing in front of the closet shelf trying to decide which basket to take.
Scorpio isn't in it for the candy.
Sagittarius will manage to wander to the next town.
Capricorn makes a list of all the hunts that have good candy and the optimal schedule to hit them all.
Aquarius builds their basket out of brightly colored soda straws and spends all night tinkering when it falls apart.
Pisces skips the whole thing to compose poetry to the Great Rabbit in the Moon.
Thanksgiving
Aries: Constantly bugging the cook, "Is it time to eat yet??"
Taurus: Indulges in pre-dinner snack foods and naps in front of the TV. Always having to be told to get fingers out of whatever the cook is making but always ready to be a taster.
Gemini: Young--engages in intellectual conversations with the older relatives until they become cranky with confusion.
Adult--orchestrates all kitchen maneuvers in 5 acts with appropriate costume changes. Reminisces while watching younger Gemini's in action.
Cancer: Hovers around the guests making sure everyone's tea glasses are filled.
Leo: Takes any chance to tell everyone it's their prized recipe they're eating.
Virgo: Constantly giving the cook advice. Attempts to rearrange the kitchen for better efficiency at least 8 times even though it is not THEIR kitchen.
Libra: Mediates ancient family arguments.
Scorpio: Young--makes visceral comments about the appearances of the food in an effort to gross everyone out and stares morosely at hated relatives.
Adult--sits around making sure that they look better/wiser/sexier than any guests OR the bird!
Sagittarius: Argues with other relatives over whether the TV is to be used for football or video games.
Capricorn: Tries to come up with the most efficient way to engineer the turkey, from basting to carving.
Aquarius: Stays in room channel-surfing until it's time for dinner.
Pisces: Sleeps all day and wonders upon awaking why the whole family is in the house and what's with all the food?
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